Am ii being to nice


new guy said:
YES! You ARE being too nice! I have had similar 'issues' in my 19 years of married bliss and you MUST FORCE her to make up YOUR mind for once and for all where YOUR 'area' of the property is so you can 'stay out of the way' with YOUR thing and let everybody else do THIER thing! I SHE willing to uproot her 'craftroom' or garden area or whatever she is into? Why always YOU having to make the big changes to accomidate everybody else? I been up and down THAT road! Ya gotta have your OWN corner somewhere!

FAIR is FAIR for YOU TOO!
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That is the best answer and post that I have ever read on the subject of model railroading.
Kudos to you New Guy!
 
marriedshades said:
Room been decided before I was asked to change not a big enough deal to start a fight. Though don't plan to move again. Am working on a grain elevator prepainting it then I'll build it.
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I guess that means you're going "upstairs". Put a lock on the door and a sign that says "Dad's Room". Doesn't matter if you do absolutely nothing in there. Make it plain that this space is yours to do as you see fit, and you'll brook no change of mind about the alternative space, even if it proves unsuitable.
 
Not sure where this is at now BUT I do agree with Iron Horseman - a "final decisions has to be had" and everyone complying with that decision. No one can expect anyone to keep changing things when it suits them, there must be compromise, give and take.

Now to the touchy side of the argument ... your wife wants you to move to suit your 19 year old daughter only so she can have privacy? I don't know about anyone else here but my philosophy is simple - although I will do my utmost to keep everyone happy in my household - it is MY household and, therefore my rules. While you live under my roof, you play by my rules and if you don't like them, there is always the option to find your own place where you can make the rules by which you live.

In my opinion, I think you are being too nice - you need to put your foot down, especially if this is the 4th time that you have been "told (evidently) to move. If you keep saying "yes dear" then you will be dictated to, manipulated and controlled until the end of your days and you'll never have the layout you want.
 
Sirfoldalot said:
That is the best answer and post that I have ever read on the subject of model railroading.
Kudos to you New Guy!
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Thanks! I'm married to a six foot plus 250 plus pounds ball of female bi-polar FURY!

I am a master of compromise and a razors edge dancer from WAY back!
 
marriedshades said:
I'm going buy some lumber and build one modul for the bench work. Even thow I don't got a plan yet I was working on a plan when we first moved in and rember some of my measurement...
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I remember reading about 2 or more previous moves. If anybody was ever a candidate for a modular layout it is you my friend!

Maybe you should build a completely portable/moveable layout until after the kids move out. From my experience, that could be a while.

Try not to stress to much over this. If these are your worst troubles in your life; you are doing well. I know you have been through worse.

I wish you well.
 
marriedshades said:
I'm going buy some lumber and build one modul for the bench work. Even thow I don't got a plan yet I was working on a plan when we first moved in and rember some of my measurement. With it built I going to say it built she have to deal with her choice. Hope buy this time next year to have all the benchwork built.
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Stay the course, you know what you gotta do better than anybody else. You struck a nerve with me on this topic cause I be fighting battles like the one you describe ALL the time! I'm very lucky we have a big enough house that we can all carve out our own spaces and not encroach on the others!

Good Luck!
 
convince her that reworking a cold, damp basement is a Spring or Summer job for those old knees and that aching back. By then maybe she'll think of some other plan. :eek:
 
I was planning on a ho modul layout we are renting so building into the house not a option. So the only real difference the move upstairs it a smaller room. So a chane in plan is the only difference I can still get all I want to start with in the space it just a little smaller portions for the non building areas
 
The Man is King of his Castle...so long as he doesn't piss off the Empress.

Seriously, I agree with the general gist of posts here. Sounds like moving is a done deal, and not necessarily a bad thing anyway. But definitely stake your claim that you're not moving YET AGAIN after this.
 
Here's what I would do. First off, definitely go with a modular layout. It can be easily moved. Move upstairs, but get your daughter to move your stuff upstairs for you. After all, she is the reason you are moving. You are going to have to fix the water issue in your basement before she can move down there. There is no way she will be able to stay in a cold damp basement with out getting ill. Make her a nice big, well insulated bedroom down there, with a nice sized walk in closet. She will be in her glory with her new room. This should also make the wife happy as well. Then go to work on your modules, in your new space. By the time you have the room filled with modules, your Daughter will be thinking about moving out. Then you can have a nice sized layout room in the basement. The closet will make a really nice workroom off the layout or a hidden staging yard. The other upside is that fixing up the basement will add a lot of value to your home. Besides, a damp basement is no place for a layout either. Especially if you are like me and suffer from Arthritis. Nothing worse than the damp to irritate it. Would make for some very unpleasant modeling. All the best to you, Ron.
 
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