The Seamstress


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Maytag "Danged Agitator"
One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"

The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and >that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their >family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked

The seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord again dipped into the river He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

Again, the seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water.

When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney.

"Is this your husband?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the seamstress.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"

The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney.

And so the Lord let her keep him.

The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and in the best interest of others.

That's our story, and we're sticking to it.

Signed,
All Us Women
 
ONE wish

About 40 miles from Las Vegas :2 tourists and very proud American in a car came out of gas. So they had to walk to Las Vegas. The tourists were from Germany,. France and the American was from Las Vegas....
So they started to walk and, of course, it was very, very hot.
They thought that if they could see the skyline from 'Vegas it would not be that far!
But they had no water because it had not appeard to them that this could happen to them.
So after 20 miles of walking and at the end:crawling they started to go nuts because of the heat and lack of water....
They went on for another 5 miles and then they collapsed almost. At that time a fairy- tale princes with magical powers appeared because she felt sorry for them. She told them that each of them could make a wish what and how many they would like to drink, just ONE wish. WOW they all thought, that's easy!! The fairy princes contignued to tell the guys that they had to crawl to a swimmingpool about 100 yards away, climbe up the diving board and jump on it: only 1 time. Direct after that they could make their wish.
The German crawled first to the swimmingpool with all his strength that was left behind he climbed on the diving board , jumped once and made a wish: "BEEEEEER!!!! he yelled and just like that the swimmingpool was filt with real German beer. He swollowed that lovely liquid till he could not breath, but he was not thursty anymore!
Than the French guy crawled to the pool and jumped too. He screamed: Wine, du VIN síl vous plait!!!!. And so it happened. He came out of the pool and was sattisfied and no thursty anymore..
At last the American. He was still proud and want to show the other guys how to jump on that diving board: He took some steps back and started to make a giant jump but unfortunately at the moment that he jumped off the board he slipped and mumbled into himself: HOLY SHIT!!!!
So the pool was filled with......
 
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