The Year of the Blonde in Review


leghome

leghome

Maytag "Danged Agitator"
The Blonde Year in Review

January - Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

February - Couldn't work in a pharmacy because the bottles wouldn't fit into the typewriter.

March - Got excited when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months because the box said "2-4 years."

April - Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

May - Couldn't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets.

June - Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - After losing in a breast stroke swimming competition, complained to the judges that the other swimmers were using their arms.

August - Told her blonde friend to hurry when trying to get into their locked car using a coat hanger because it was starting to rain and the top was down.

September - When asked what the capital of California was: answered "C."

October - Hates M & M's because they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked a turkey for 4 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 120.

December - Couldn't call 911 because there was no "11" on any phone
 
Here's one kinda along the same lines...

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One!!! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY?
Because no one else in this house knows HOW to
Change a light bulb! They don't even know that the
Bulb is BURNED OUT!! They'd sit there in the dark
For THREE DAYS before they figured it out!! And,
Once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to
Find the light bulbs despite the fact they've been in
The SAME CUPBOARD for the past 13 YEARS! But
If they did, by some miracle of God, actually find
The bulbs 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to
Stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would
STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT
WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID LIGHT BULBS CAME
IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE
GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL
SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT
DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE
AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS DARN HOUSE! I'm sorry. What was your question?

Sound familiar?!? Dave
 
Two blondes walk into a building...... you'd think one of them would have seen it!!

Blonde in a hairdresser wearing a walkman. the hair dresser removes the phones to start cutting, the blonde drops dead...... the hairdresser listens to the walkman..... breath in, breath out, breath in, breath out.

Ken.
 
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