I haven't ever really belonged to a club. Probably the only one I would consider joining is the La Mesa Club in San Diego, even though it's 2500 miles away - I would join just to support their efforts. I have been a visiting operator there on several occasions - it's a great example (and one of the few) of a club that was chartered with a purpose by (at the time) young people who have stuck to the original purpose, and almost 30 years later the results are beyond impressive. Most clubs don't do as well.
There is a modular group locally here, which has been around 30+ years. It was formed as a no-dues, loose-knit group. They have their own module standards, rather than following NMRA or any others. I knew a lot of people in that group, grew up with some of them actually. I ran trains on the layout at shows, and eventually built a small module but I only did a few shows. The group has been around long enough to have produced *at least* three spin-offs. Those are just the ones I know about - as far as I know two have died off, and the third is fairly new and has adopted completely different standards. The module group provided a get-together point and a way for guys who couldn't build a full layout for whatever reason to run their stuff. The politics were minimal, due to a lack of dues, treasury, or any formal officers. They organized around a volunteer "run boss" - one person was designated for each show, it was on them to get space at the show, make the phone calls, find out who was going to be there, coordinate setup, etc. The experience for the various members was often contingent on who the run boss was, because this person often felt the need to become Mr. Drill Sergeant. Crossing Guard Syndrome (aka Hall Monitor Syndrome) still runs strong in clubs, even informal ones - not just model railroading but organizations of all kinds.
At any rate, once I built my own basement layout - plain as it was - there wasn't much point in putting up with the module club politics just to get to run my train for a few minutes, before the slightest uncoupling problem occurred and it was yanked before I had a chance to fix it, etc. There were some very nice people and good modelers in the group, many were and still are friends today (both in and out of the group)........ but collectively, they seemed to become more obsessed with bizarre, huge setups to win "best of show" at GATS shows and that ilk, running gigantic trains, etc. No debug time was ever allowed for, even knowing that most of the members did not have layouts and had no opportunities to test & tune their locos and rolling stock in between shows. A lot of guys had some very nice stuff sitting, just because of the rule that trains had to be kept moving - so your brass loco would remain "test run only" while some AHM pile of junk logged miles at 120 per just because it would stay on the track and the Walthers Goo on the horn-hooks kept the train together. It really started out well, a place where the nitpicky, prototype modelers could share some space with the AHM/Tyco runners, but in the end I'd have to say the AHM mentality won out. The club still keeps going with that philosophy, and they have been successful with it. They just aren't of much interest to me anymore, unfortunately.
I think that many clubs go through the same transitions - no club is going to be all things to all people. When clubs split, the two factions often expend great energy putting down the other, but the reality is the split was necessary and good for the club, to enable each group to pursue its own goals. That's how stuff happens. Even if I could hook up with a group today that shares my philosophy 100%, 5 years from now it could be down to 50%. Or 5%. That's just how it goes.
Andy